SEC Football Vibes: What In God’s Name, Hugh Freeze?

Take a look at what we’re vibing on in the SEC, including wondering what exactly Hugh Freeze will say next and the pressure growing on Gus Malzahn.

Can you believe this is the last SEC Football Vibes of 2016? What started as a little idea back in May has grown into a weekly column that I love to write and, I’m quite certain, thousands of people look forward to reading every Thursday. (Just go with me on this.) It is quite a thrill to give my takes and thoughts on something I have been following all of my life.

This year has been a whirlwind, and the vibing has been on point. The Hamilton soundtrack is still filling my days with music, while Japanese BBQ (sorry, but I don’t mind cooking my own food unlike some of my colleagues) has been keeping me fed, and Budweiser made me a star with a commercial for the ages.

Let’s do this one more time as the year comes to a close, taking on the best and worst of the conference and getting ready to break through onto the other side of 2017 in the latest edition of SEC Football Vibes.

– For the love of all things holy, Hugh Freeze, sometimes you need to just shut your mouth and realize that the things you say are absolutely ridiculous. Comparing Ole Miss’ violations to Jesus getting nailed on the cross? What the devil is that? You do realize that saying things like this won’t get you any closer to becoming Joel Osteen’s assistant, right?

– Still on Freeze. Earlier this year, the Rebels head coach says he is often a target because of his religious beliefs. Yes, Hugh. A wealthy white, heterosexual Christian man in Mississippi really needs to be worried about being a “target” because of their beliefs. Has he read his state’s history and what is currently going on in and around the country? It is like the man lives in a bubble. “Woe is me. The white male has been kept down wayyyyyy too long.” Give me a break.

– What is going on with Ed Orgeron in this picture?

It amazes me that a guy that seemingly spends three hours working on nothing but his upper body would wear a shirt into an ice tub like this. As Ulla says in The Producers, “if you got it, flaunt it.”

– Heads up to Gus Malzahn: if you think the pressure on you to win has been high before, it will be at another level next season with all the talent returning and Jarrett Stidham coming in. Add in playing Georgia and Alabama at home, and you better stop that six-game losing streak to the two rivals.

– Washington players and coaches said all the right things leading up to their matchup against Alabama, that is until defensive lineman Greg Gaines called the SEC overrated. I’m sure Nick Saban will remind his players of this right before kickoff.

– This is basketball related, but Dick Vitale posted a picture of him with Denny Crum at the Virginia-Louisville game last night. In the background, there was a guy with a Kentucky sweatshirt and hat on.

Why do people do this? Why go to a rivals’ home game when your team is not playing and wear your team’s colors? Are these people just starving for attention? Do they want to be noticed and think it is funny to do it? Granted, the people who do this never attended the school they support anyway, but someone needs to talk some common sense into them, otherwise, they will someday find themselves on the opposite end of a butt kicking.

– Back to football and the fact that Dan Mullen finally released a player from his program due to getting arrested. Oh sure, it took the guy getting arrested three times in a single month, but Mullen finally put his foot down (he learned that from Jeffrey Simmons) and drew a line in the sand. Two arrests in a month are FINE, young man, but three (especially for armed robbery and kidnapping) are inexcusable here in Starkville.

– My absolute favorite part of bowl season is the trophy ceremonies in which teams are so delighted to have won a prestigious prize like the Belk Bowl. I mean, it is the better alternative to losing the game, but do you really want to display that trophy in your offices and try to woo recruits with it? Of course not.

– The SEC East is going to be wide open next season, and I am already naming my dark horse: Kentucky. All the ingredients will be in place for a surprising season for the Wildcats, including the running back duo of Benny Snell Jr. and Boom Williams. And yes, I realize this pick will come back to bite me.

Much like Colin Firth, Nick Saban can really wear a sweater. That man must own thirty crimson sweaters, and each of them looks as good on him as the last one.

– How happy are fans outside of Tuscaloosa that Lane Kiffin will be gone and out of the conference in a little over a week? That has to make the new year somewhat better for a lot of people. I’m sure trolling the likes of North Texas and Temple will not be as fun for him.

– Once again, I propose to Les Miles a chance to accompany me on my two-week trek around Europe in February. He has nothing going on, and it would be a good time. Who is his agent? Who do I have to get in touch with to make this happen?

– Still wondering what exactly I did to get blocked by the great Bret Bielema on Twitter. I love the guy, even praising him all season long. Bret, you can come to Europe as well. Might as well make it a group trip. Bring Jeff Long with you and he can pay for the whole thing.

– Lastly, I would like to say that it has been a pleasure serving as the main SEC writer here at Campus Insiders, but it is time for me to move on and take on new challenges. (Oh, that wasn’t President-elect Trump offering me a cabinet position? Damn it.) Well, I guess I will be right back here next week as always, bringing you the thoughts of a crazy man. Have a safe and happy New Year!

MORE: 20 Biggest College Football Stories Of 2016